A persistent fad started by BlackMageJawa during SC2K5. Based on the Moderator's seconds game from April Fools' Day 2005, the idea was that whenever a newb (ie- anyone who doesn't visit Board 8 during the offseason) made one of those horrible common and annoying "Why is ______ losing , he/she/it is much better than _____" topics, we would look at the seconds of their post time, and post the appopriate response. All of the responses were submitted by Board 8 users prior to the start of the contest.

Previously, users would post not only the phrase, but the seconds as well (for example posting "00- *Explodes*" rather than just "*Explodes*") which seems to ruin the continuity of posts. For SpC2K6 the numbers have mostly been omitted in order to confuse the newbies more, although they may return in future as some feel that making it clearer what it is adds to the insult.

For future contests, Board 8 members will be suggesting new phrases. Here is what we currently have for the most recent contest.

As of January 2010, some Seconds Game responses are now considered "disruptive" by the moderating team and will result in disciplinary action.

The Character Battle IX Response ListEdit

00 - *Explodes*

01 – XMFD that's what you actually believe?

02 – paramore twitter boobs

03 - Your bracket just tore its quad!

04 - Sorry to disappoint you, but on this board, we don't talk about the contest. We only post pictures of Red Pandas: 274_29877702501_3001_n.jpg

05 - one less bracket to worry about

06 - Your ideas intrigue me and I would like to subscribe to your newsletter

07 - [Losing Character] is so screwed

08 - So this is a story all about how your life got flip-turned upside down.

09 - ya well tell that to billy michtlle

10 -

11 - You wanted _____ to win? TOO BAD! WALUIGI TIME!

12 - You sass that unhoopy topic creator? Now there's a strag who doesn't know where his towel is.

13 - Your face is bees.

14 - ##Vote:[topic creator]

15 - now dey gotta surfer

16 - Just another nail in your bracket's coffin

17 -


19 - Blacker than the depths of darkest night, hotter and more bitter than Hell itself... that is your bracket.

20 - You thought [loser] would defeat [winner] so you get NOTHING! YOU LOSE! Good day sir!

21 - His lust for death and sexual pleasure is only quenched by devouring his lovers whole. He also makes fine linens.

22 - Look to your bracket, now back to mine, now back to your bracket NOW BACK TO MINE. Sadly, it isn't mine, but if you would have chosen [Winning Character Here] It could smell like mine.

23 - This topic is not super nice, dawg.

24 – That’s so interesting, TC.

25 - ya go my [winning character]

26 - Don't worry, it's opposite day!


28 - That's nice. Here's a picture of midgets playing basketball!

29 - Wrong. Try again, kid.

30 - At least 40 million sperm are released per ejaculation, yet somehow you were born.

31 – Did you make sure you chose the fun entry?

32 - You bought an N-Gage, didn't you?

33 - We held a meeting and decided to screw up your bracket

34 -Thank you for your irrelevant opinion.

35 -

36 - The velociraptor spots you 40 meters away and attacks, accelerating at 4 m/s^2 up to its top speed of 25 m/s. When it spots you, you begin to flee, quickly reaching your top speed of 6 m/s. How far can you get before you're caught and devoured?

37 - Screw this topic I have money!

38 - Menji76 asked a blind girl to the movies and you still manage to look dumber than him, wow.

39 - ATTENTION DUELIST! My hair is taunting you!

40 – because your bracket so bad, rice krispies won't even talk to you

41 - It's all part of The Plan™

42 - This topic sucks and is now about trains

43 - Hey do you guys scream after you pee?

44 - Literally Obsessed


46 – Son, thinking [losing character] could win this was about as smart as Microsoft's "always online" idea.

47 - cool story bro

48 - This is why you've never touched a happy fruit

49 - "hello [insert username]"

50 - War13104 had Kefka beating Crono. He still looks smarter than you.



53 - [insert username], go home.

54 - Wow, what a great and original point, TC. You're definitely streets ahead of everyone else.

55 - Well EXCUUUUUUUUSE me, princess!


57 - my heart gors out to your bracket

58 -

59 -

See alsoEdit

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